Your relationship is the most important thing you have. But there’s been many changes and you find you aren’t connecting like you used to.
Communication is strained and you feel you just avoid the hard conversations, letting things go, but inside the resentment builds. Whether it’s money, sex, trust issues, it all feels too hard to tackle on your own.
The couple relationship is one of the most intimate relationships we have. Life is full of changes and an intimate relationship faces many changes, ups, and downs, and planned and unexpected events. It’s not surprising that you would find yourself needing help with problems in your relationship at some point.
There are many different options for resolving relationship problems. At My Winnipeg Therapist, we offer counselling for relationship issues for a variety of concerns. The counselling approach we take with you depends on what the problem is and what changes you want.
We help couples who are struggling in their relationships to build intimacy and trust, improve communication and getting back to enjoying your life together. Here are some of the more common relationship issues that we have helped individuals and couples address:
Communication for Couples
You and your partner struggle to communicate more than you’d like. Things break down too quickly into blaming and arguments. The resentment builds. You’re finding it hard to get your partner to talk or it’s getting harder to talk to them. And when you try to talk, things can get worse. You want effective communication with your partner but you’re just not sure how to get both of you doing it in a better way. While communication is the number one reason couples break up, good couples communication can leave both of you feeling listened to, understood and supported. For effective Couples Therapy, the approach at My Winnipeg Therapist is is to work with you and your partner to understand where the communication is breaking down, what are your styles of communicating, and to provide ways to communicate more constructively. With Couples Therapy we’ll teach you ways which allow you both to feel heard which leads to feeling better about each other and feeling better about the relationship.
Couples with Financial Stress
You are your partner disagree about financial issues. You end up arguing more than you'd like. Their view of money causes you a lot of stress. You disagree on where the money should be managed and who decides what. You don’t understand why they see money that way. And they can’t understand your point of view. You know finances are serious and are important to your standard of living, but it’s hard to see eye-to-eye on important spending issues. After parenting, finances are the biggest source of conflict in a marriage. At My Winnipeg Therapist, we understand there can be significant tension around finances which can cause long-lasting harm to a relationship, including damaging trust and connection. In couples counselling we work to help both of you understand each-others views, expectations, and values around money. This leads to a better understanding of each other’s views on money, especially underlying fears and anxiety, and how this influences you or your partner. Couples therapy helps you better understand where your both coming from, where compromises can be made and how to feel more like a team working for a shared goal.
Are you with someone who is from a different country, a different ethnicity, different religious beliefs or significant differences in background? You know a cross-cultural relationship can be exciting, rewarding and a great learning experience. And it can be very challenging at times with misunderstandings, confusion and full of different expectations. It’s challenging because you can’t depend on the cultural norms and social expectations to guide you. How you speak to each other can be challenging, but you know the tone of your voice, your body language, and even when you say it can be very different than your partner’s way of communicating. Maybe your partner makes a hand gesture to indicate they are making a point and to you, it means nothing totally different! You discuss parents and family in a certain way and you’re partner sees it totally different, or the way children should be raised! You know how different your upbringing has been. And the list goes on. Depending on the issue or concern, a good starting place to start is looking at the values you hold from your culture that influence your views. Helping each pattern better understand their own values and how to effectively communicate those is an important starting point in couples therapy in culturally diverse relationships. Couples in cross-cultural relationships are quite openminded and that is a huge strength that provides stability and richness to the relationship.
Differences in Sex
Is the lack of intimacy leaving feeling lonely or rejected? Or are you feeling pressured or stressed by your partner's needs? You want things to be different, to change in a way that leaves you feeling better about your partner and about yourself. You want to feel intimate, but you want it to be natural, where both of you are on the same page where you really know what each other needs. At My Winnipeg Therapist, we know that physical intimacy, especially sex, or lovemaking, is one of the most emotionally powerful experiences we can have with someone. It can be emotionally negative and it leaves you feeling rejected or even shamed. Because it is so heavy with significance, this can make differences, even small differences seem so significant. You and your partner’s desire for sex are different. And that causes hurt feelings, sometimes feeling unwanted, unloved. And interests and preferences are different and it seems like only one of you gets to be satisfied. And that doesn’t feel right. And you can feel the resentment at times. At My Winnipeg Therapist Couples Therapy for sex differences involves getting a good understanding of problem areas for you as a couple, what are the areas of dissatisfaction. What are the obstacles in terms of expectants, values? And what are the areas of satisfaction? Areas of satisfaction, even if small, are where we can build and expand on what is working for you both. It’s a positive approach that when uses effectively decrease anxiety or worry and increase a sense of connection and satisfaction. Starting from there helps us focus on and build on what makes you both feel good. Couples therapy can help you learn about those differences and develop a better understanding of these differences in each other. And understanding can lead to discovering aspects of each other where you share similarities in interest, values, views. This allows you to create an intimacy that is safe, satisfying and pleasurable for both of you.
Regardless of the relationship issue, at My Winnipeg Therapist, we work with you to fully understand where the problem is in your relationship, what kind of change you are hoping for and finding the solutions that will help you get the relationship you want.
Once you contact us, we will do a brief consultation on the phone and then assign you to one of our couples experts for your first session.